Transformation is not incremental change — though it may happen as a result of small actions taken consistently over long periods of time. Transformation is radical reshaping. What was, morphed into what is.
Transformation always takes place in the context of relationship.
You can transform any situation, heal any pattern, by being in right relationship with it. To do this, you have to be in right relationship with yourself first. Fill yourself with love — with the power of your soul’s presence — before you engage with the situation and the ecology within which it exists. When you do this, you become an agent of wholeness, a servant of the Sacred.
Sovereignty rules, so any transformation that involves another being requires consent and collaboration from everyone involved.
The central qualities of any good relationship are the same no matter what — love, kindness, generosity, communion, devotion, communication, truth, openness, curiosity, playfulness, integrity, sovereignty, acceptance, willingness, support, and so on.
Every pattern, every situation, is also a relationship — between you and the pattern, between you and the situation and the other people and elements involved in it.
So, for example, if you want to heal or transform a pattern where you’re consistently late — for appointments, for anything that you’ve committed to showing up for at a specific time — you can approach that pattern as you would any relationship.
Be curious. Be open. What parts of you hold or carry this pattern? How old are these aspects of you? Ask these inner selves to show you or tell you what they believe, what they feel, what they need.
Bring a clearer, stronger energy — of compassion, love, sovereignty, wholeness — into the encounter with the pattern, and with those aspects of yourself that hold the pattern. These inner selves may be young, confused, inarticulate, or hanging onto experiences that shaped their worldview and that continue to govern their choices and actions.
Help them release what’s no longer true for them and you. Support them in liberating themselves from past experiences, and bring them back into your heart, where they can contribute their gifts to your wholeness. Explore what happens, as you develop relationships of trust and love with each of these aspects of you.
Wholeness embraces everything in the ecology of being — light and dark, healed and unhealed, clear and muddy. To transform anything in your ecology, whether it’s an inner pattern or a situation or experience in the world around you, you have to first acknowledge it as it is. Then, come into right relationship with it by meeting it with your own loving, sovereign presence. Act in harmony with the pattern of your being. Honor its sovereignty and presence as well.
In any situation, the clearest, strongest energy prevails. So, bring an energy of love and truth, wholeness and compassion, power and presence, to any encounter. It will transform you, the situation, and everyone involved.